Sex with husband...men's advice would be great.?

So I do understand the problem that the male libido is sometimes for excitable than a woman's, but I feel that my husband's may be causing problems in our marriage. Every morning before I can go to sleep (or before my husband will get up) he wants to have sex. Anytime we are in the bedroom he wants to have sex, before he goes to bed he wants to have sex. We already have sex 1-3 times a day and it isn't always because I want to. My job makes me significantly tired and I just don't have the energy or desire to have sex that often. I in turn hurt my husbands feelings if I don't recipricate sex everytime he makes some sexual comment towards me. Does this make me a bad wife? Should I be expected to have sex everytime he wants to? Isn't it okay to have ';a day off'; sort of speak? How do I talk to my husband without making him feel that attraction isn't the reason I don't want to have sex? I don't know what to do.Sex with husband...men's advice would be great.?
I in turn hurt my husbands feelings if I don't recipricate sex everytime he ask .





You got the right prediction of how he feel when deprive of sex. Sex for men is not about attraction but it is about satisfaction that sex can offer. You can talk to him in regard to your feeling of having sex 1-3 times a day. Discus with him what you do and do not like. The best time to talk to him is right after sex where in he is contented. Tell him softly what is inside of your heart and what you want to happened. Then met him half way in his decision. Take note: never, never deprive him of sex when he wanted it. That will turn off men's feeling toward his woman.


I presumed that you are young and the libido is still high but sooner or latter it will subside a little. With a generous assumption of a year or two. (Are you still in your honeymoon stage right?)


Remember that in newly married(I presumed) lot of understanding and patience are needed for both of you on order that friction in marriage is avoided. You need to open your two line of communication as much as possible.


Pray always for a harmonious marriage.





I hope that this enlighten you in anyway.


And remember that God loves you.





God blessSex with husband...men's advice would be great.?
You can say NO when you are tired. You have the right to that. Unless you really aren't attarcted to him thats a different story. Talk together, find middle ground where both of you will understand each other's needs and desires. Try exercising too, it relieves tress and increases your libido. Good luck!
I did not know you could take a day off in a marriage? If you can does that give you the right to do whatever you want? Come on you knew his sex drive before you married him. Now you want to ***** about it. I bet if it was the other way around your question would be I think he is cheating on me. Women the world may never figure ya'll out I swear.
You are dealing with the most delicate object in the known universe - the male ego - and the most delicate subject known to man - sex - Its your body, you are the one who makes the decisions, not him, but you will be tap dancing through a mine field on that one. Good luck.
It sounds like you are a loving wife and he should appreciate it. You probably should start letting him know that while you cant or daont have the energy to do it all the time like he does you are willing to compromise.
Marriage is give and take. sometimes you just can't give. It is ok to say no. My ex wife had a few ways to get me to relent that left me feeling ok and that I wasn't being rejected. It is ok for him to pleasure himself sometimes.
Come to an ageeable compromise. This may mean having sex when you aren't in the mood, and him going without when he is in the mood.





Don't blame his sex drive, maybe yours is as much a problem for him.
Everything is normal.





You guys just need to work out whats best for the two of you.





Sex needs to be what the two of you work out.
It makes you a wife. By definition, a wife is a woman who used to be sexual but now is sexless.
Sometimes two people's sex drive just is not compatible.
1-3 times a day? Your man has a problem. That is way way over normal. He's addicted.
hand him a skin magazine and a box of kleenex
Wow! You didn't say how long you have been with your sex-machine, but it appears at least 6 years. 1-3 times per day (?!) and you have a job that sounds like some off hours, a child, a home and all the other things that any dimwit can understand takes all of our energy to make everything work like fitting a puzzle together.


Nola, girl.... I just know that you have talked to him about this (at least once?). You are the perfect examplof ';submissive';. That man needs to see you as his ';equal partner';. He needs to tone down that hard-on and start appreciating you as the wonderful woman you are. Sex is the PLUS. .not the Mainstay. You are a SAINT in my eyes. You are no where near a ';bad wife';, you are too good! You put me to shame!!! But, just talk with him. He probably thinks this is the norm, maybe you do too. If he makes ';comments'; to you if you aren't feeling like it then I would be very careful that he could be abusive down the road just for not getting what he wants. Try to work with him. You are amazing!
My husband and I had a similar problem, but it was I with the increased libido. Finally we talked about it and I discovered that sometimes there were things going on that made him feel not in the mood. For example work. I thought sex was a stress reliever for him, but it appeared it was more so for me. So I just had to understand his feelings and I wouldn't advance him as much. If we had sex I would try to wait a day or two before trying again, and mind you very subtly. So now, we're at an understanding. I still want sex as much as before, but I find myself masterbating the days I don't have sex with my husband. Maybe try buying him a toy?
I know you were mostly asking for advice from men, but jeez, they weren't very helpful, were they??!! You need to be able to say ';no'; if you don't feel like it; if you're tired now, what's it going to be like when you have children? Overall, sex should be for the enjoyment of BOTH partners. I'm not saying that it's a big deal to do it even if you don't feel like it sometimes, maybe even often; but 3 times a day? That's too much of doing what you don't want to do. It's unfair to you. What happens when you try to talk to him about it? I'm just thinking that you will build up resentment, and over time this will affect the pleasure of both partners. I mean, if you don't want to have sex, are you even getting off? That would be a big issue for me. Try telling him you will only do it once a day, but he gets to pick the time and place. That way he still has some choice/control. P.S. Try to appreciate the situation- my BF and I don't live together, and with kids and stuff, we don't get together as often as we'd like!
You and your husband need to have a very open and honest conversation with each other. A marriage is about mutual respect. It is about giving 100% to your partner and not expecting anything in return. Marriage is about more than sex, it is about two people living every moment of thier lives together, working in unity to make the marriage work in all areas.





You need to be honest with him and he should respect you enough to understand and come up with a compromise. You are his queen and he should respect you and treat you in that regard. As long as he knows the truth about why, he should not feel rejected but looks for ways to let it be about you and not about him. One of the ways I have done this in my own relationship is to please my wife with cunnilingus without expecting anything in return. My wife has had some of the best night's sleep when I was able to please her, make her *** and just allow her to go to sleep.
I think some of your replies are sick. She is a woman who has a right. There is a law that says that if a woman does not want to have sex, even with her husband, then that is rape.





Yes, you both need to talk about it, and you may need to visit a counsellor who can help you and maybe explain to your husband that his demands are causing a lot of problems and that he needs to respect his wife, as it appears to me that he has no respect for her, he just uses her when he wants his 5 min of happiness and relief not really caring for his wife.





Maybe I am from the old school, but when you are married, no-one belongs to each other, you are a partnership and both have rights.





If your husband cares for you and loves you, then he will listen, if not, you may need to shock him into reality.





If you keep this up you will end up very sick, and then what, will he continue to use you for is self gratification? You need to be assertive and say NO.


Blessings JackM
its clear you dont talk enough to each other.try setting a day or two for sex.so your both expecting it.you both need to discuss issues and do more together.also, have anyone of you thought about working the same hours somehow?yes one of you might have to get another job.you must talk to him about the problem, dont be scared , he needs to know.and by the way, i am a male and understand the situation,so why can he?talk to him when you both have about an hour to talk together.tell him your feelings and he needs to understand them. remember dont rush the talk with him,take it slow.good luck, i wish you the best.