Men ~ Threesome Advice?

Women who have been in this position can answer too...


I'm sure its not very common for women to really want this and have the guts to make it happen, but men, if you were with a girl for a couple of years, loved each other unconditionally, and would do anything for one another, how would you feel if your girlfriend suggested a threesome or ';swapping'; with another couple that you were friends with? Also, how would you want her to approach you about it? I'm in my 20s, no kids and not married. I'm just curious, I love making fantasies happen. I love him and don't want to hurt his feelings because he really is the best lover I have ever had and I love him dearly. I just think it would be fun. Sometimes I'm mad at myself for even considering asking him....Men ~ Threesome Advice?
This is something my wife and I never really had to deal with because we were both on the same page when it came to sexual fantasies and our ideas of love and sex and the separation between the two. But here's how I think you'd want to approach it.





First, you do have to worry about him getting hurt and defensive because of it. Most people's first response would be ';What?! I'm not enough for you?!'; We both know that's not the case, but we've been conditioned by others with that idea that that is the way a relationship is supposed to be, that that one person will fufill your every emtional, intellectual and physical need for the rest of your life.





The truth is no one person can, and to ask them to do such is setting yourself up for dissapointment and eventual resentment of them because ';they let you down';.





The common misconception about opening-up your relationship sexually is that you are doing it because your spouse doesn't satisy you. Anyone who's ever really done it knows that's not the case at all. It's just a fun, exciting fantasy come to life. It's sex, and that's it.





So first you have to approach it as the fact that it is a sexual fantasy, and that sex is sex and love is love, and although ou can enjoy sex with someone you don't love you enjoy it the most with him, because you do love him. It's not replacement sex, it's additional sex. And the same goes for him. He should enjoy sex with the other woman, and he knows deep down in his heart that he could have sex with someone else and it would in no way diminish the love he feels for you. But it's hard to project the same onto your spouse.





You have to be very secure in yourself and your value to your spouse, so you have to let him know how much you value him and that this is simply sex and nothing more.





First, lets face it, unless you were a virgin when you got married you had sex, and good sex at that, with someone else. But that obviously wasn't ';enough'; or you'd be married to them instead of who you are married to. THAT is what noone but your spouse will ever be to you, and nobody can replace that.





Below is a link to some great posts on The Swingers Board about this very subject. I hope it helps.Men ~ Threesome Advice?
First and formoat, do not do this randomly, you will regret it. If it ever comes down to ';a possibility'; then find a good swingers club, one that has an orientation session and ask questions. They have heard them all so there is no big deal. Then you will have a better idea of what is going on. Also, never ';get together'; with a friend, unless you have been to swingers clubs for some time and you make friends there. It can work, but sex is much too important to be left to amatuers.
Adding other people into your sex life together isn't something you should do on a whim. It can sound really hot as a fantasy, but when it is really happening and you see your partner really going at it with another person your emotions can blow up like crazy and ruin everything. Have you ever talked with him about fantasies like this? Or would this be coming out of the blue? This is something you need to talk about a lot and take slowly if you want your relationship to still be there after the fantasy is over.
ChiChi, I would be crushed and broken-hearted if my girlfriend suggested this...
Are you saying a threesome with another guy?





If my girl asked for that I'd break up with her and tell her to go be with that guy. Same with the swapping, I don't want any other guy nailing a girl I love.





Now the standard threesome is two girls and a guy and it ends badly 95% of the time.
I'd draw the line there because sex is best with 2 people not 3. Emotions come into play that you don't expect when you see your partner with another person.
If youy want to do this with another guy, he may be less than happy. But if you're thinking of bringing in another girl, he might be more than willing. It all depends on which way you go.
if u want a guy as the 3rd partner ur bf will be pissed off! its gotcha be a hot gal..